Although this announcment is about as important as “hey, somebody left their shampoo in the shower”, I would like to share that my not-so-illustrious 15 year Spring League ‘career’ will come to an end this week. I realize I’ll never be able to catch Sheen in the all-time points standings so it’s time to hang them up.
Needless to say, this has been the most fun I’ve had every Spring since I first moved to Mt. Airy. You guys are the absolute best, funniest and most fucked up characters I’ve ever had the pleasure to (try) and play hockey with. Thanks for letting me embarrass myself out there year after year and for allowing me to overstay my welcome in this league by about 10 years too many.
I look forward to coming back on occassion to drink and heckle, which was my only strong suit to begin with and perhaps the commish might even let me call play-by-play for a game here or there. Hopefully I’ll run into you knuckleheads (quite literally) on the ice somewhere down the road but my WSL days are over after this week.
Cheers,
G-Train/Bevs

Fuck you. Stossel is a treasure. Pay LaCorte.

First of all, you can’t even make moonshine in 6 minutes – seven is the key number here!!!

I hope we get the cosmonaut to make predictions again, but I fear Vlad may be busy shining Putin’s beefy tits so here goes:

Jaeger 3-1, and Schoup drops his stick but manages to gets a five minute major for butt-ending, while Felix and Lennertz IV combine to get away with four combined actual butt ends. Expect a few goals from Curt McGurt.

Espolon 6-4, Dom rides his hot streak and gets an empty-netter to officially outscore LevBarn on the season, and also accidentally shits his calves while simultaneously belching. Crybaby steals Frain’s jersey after the game b/c he misses the scent.

Goose 8-5, seems like a good revenge game after The Flood Incident. Ben “Not the Mama! Not the Mama!” Hayward has a big game and inspires Domi 3.14149 to go back to bare face next year. Abrams scores 5 points by continuing to do the opposite of what the hecklers tell him. Late game knuckles a possibility, and that’s just in the Sake locker room!

Saturday morning Walnut Lane tee times available!

I’ve got the 9:00, 9:10, 9:20 and 9:30am tee times reserved at Walnut Lane ($45 for the round w/ cart paid to course + $5 cash for wagering). Best ball, 1 stroke off for every 4 empty beer cans at the end of the round. Who wants a spot in this year’s Losers Golf Outing?