Playoffs: Tuesday, May 28th

Tuesday 7:45 PM
The Roots vs Wu-Tang
6 FINAL 1
Tuesday 9:10 PM
Run DMC vs Fresh Crew
5 FINAL 4
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Pete Rose
Pete Rose
5 years ago

Wutang -2.5 (o/u: 9)

Fresh Crew – 1.5 (o/u:11)

Roots Outright! over
Freshcrew – under

6Pac O’ Coors
6Pac O’ Coors
5 years ago

Here’s my predictions that I wrote back in ‘94 but am just releasing now:

Jimmy Fallons vs Two-Wang Clam
The DVP Clams quief a tight one out, with the Ruts giving a good battle despite the hardships of “Ear” Jenkins, Vinny Two-Toes, Pete the Friendly Groin, The Incredible Folding Jorts, and whatever the hell happened to Preuss. True to the Wu, Cherp cuts his own dick off while celebrating the win.

Run PCP vs Acti-Fresh
The Booger Bowl is a high-flying affair, as two big nose-pickers square off in a duel of red-line-in. The feminine pads drip one out after limiting Laux to 4 goals on 3 shots and two bank-shots that go in off Stossel’s urethra – now that’s what I call a tip-in! Frain with the winner in an 8-6 affair while Crybaby weeps gently somewhere.

Nitrous Spill vs Pubic Enemy
The membranes smash the clocks, as the enemas look as lost as Flavor Flav at a trigonometry dissertation trying to solve Flood. The runny buttplugs console each other afterward by reading aloud their mandatory 3-page essays on why Heavy D is the best player in the league.

Fat Fucks vs De La Skoal
It’s bears over twinks as the Gray Rights Advocates win a boring one over the Flower Children in a battle to once and for all separate the LGB’s from the TQA’s. The league commissions Chest-O to build a bronze fountain of Schoup at center ice after the game, improving ice conditions greatly.

Public Enema
Public Enema
5 years ago

Your just chopped ten points off of my IQ.

Ice Pube
Ice Pube
5 years ago

League sources say it was a double upset – Roots and DMC with the wins, Wu Tang crying in their malt liquor and Doug E Fresh spilling their Earl Greys while peeling out of the parking lot at a reasonable speed.

Public Enema
Public Enema
5 years ago
Reply to  Ice Pube

Hextall saves most of those shots.